Cinco de Mayo is, for those with a limited grasp of Spanish, just a date on the calendar. Don’t be alarmed. This is the one day of the year that is in the Spanish. Cinco de Mayo means, try to stay with me here… the Fifth of May. On this day, many Americans pile into authentic Mexican restaurants in America. They will tell you that Cinco de Mayo is Mexican Independence Day. Do not believe these people. They have been drinking. Some are even drunk. Mexican Independence Day is the 16th of September, which ironically starts at midnight on the 15th of September. Never heard of it? That’s because you’re American, you live in the United States of American, and you do not celebrate other countries independence from other, other countries. Unless they serve alcohol. Then perhaps you can make an exception. In fact, Cinco de Mayo is actually a magnifica American tradition where Americans order enormous margaritas at authentic Mexican restaurants to celebrate the Mexican victory, in 1862, of The Battle of Puebla against the French army. Oh, it was a gloriousa battle. You should have seen those Mexicans. They sent those French fries scurrying back to France. For Mexico, this was muy bueno. Right up until the French came back and took Puebla, and occupied Mexico, with the same effort they put into a cassoulet. For Mexico, this was muy triste.